Logistics and Supply Chain Management

by Olumide
(USA)

MBA graduate with a specialization in General Management seeks a management position utilizing my strong result-oriented and problem solving skills with 4 years experience in position of good administration while enabling organizations gain competitive advantage for sustainable profitability.

Response from Carl: Thanks Olumide. I think you're off to a pretty good start here! I like how you open up by mentioning that you have an MBA as a hiring manager will know right away that you have this degree which can come in very handy when a job requires it.

Since your Job Title section refers to a position in Logistics and Supply Chain Management as being your desired role, I wonder if you could add something here that would allude to both your management experience (if any) and your previous logistics and supply chain experience? I suspect a hiring manager would want to know this up front.

Two quick grammatical suggestions:

1. The phrase that reads "4 years experience in position of good administration..." sounds like it should read as "4 years experience in positions of good administration..." as I believe you're referring to the positions you've held in your career ie. more than one position.

2. It looks like you can add the words "to" and "a" to the sentence that reads "enabling organizations to gain a competitive advantage..."

Carl